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November 15, 2017

Conflict is bad.  This seems to be a universal truth.  But let me fill you in on a little secret.  This is not true.  Conflict is not bad.  In fact, conflict provides us with an opportunity to get closer to one another – provided of course it’s done in the right way.  When a couple engages in a fight in a healthy way, and resolves the issue, they are closer at the other end.  Isn’t this ultimately what we’re striving for?  Connection. 

            The question then becomes, ‘How doe we com...

November 1, 2017

Here’s what I know for certain.  85% of all couples who come to see me struggle with communication.  Here’s why.  Men and women are, DIFFERENT!  We learned this from my earlier blogs, so if you’re only joining us now, it would be helpful to go back and get up to speed.  We’ll be right here when you get back.  Done?  Okay, let’s move on.  The differences between men and women are vast, but for today, we’re going to focus our effort on communication. 

            Let’s start with how women c...

October 15, 2017

I seriously hesitated in writing this blog because I could foresee controversy and some taking offense to these words.  It gave me pause when I first listened to Rabbi Aryeh Pamensky’s lecture, but then I interviewed thousands of my male clients, who seemed to agree with the Rabbi.  Of course nothing here is fact – only information I present to you as a result of my learnings, research, and experience with my own clients.  There are outliers.  You make your own conclusions. 

            In the first blog abou...

October 1, 2017

Welcome back!  To bring you up to speed, here’s what you’ve missed.  A HAPPY WIFE = HAPPY LIFE.  When do you make your wife happy?  ALL THE TIME!  When you do, she multiplies that happiness and gives it back to you ten-fold.  So the question then becomes, ‘How do you make your wife happy?’  Attention, Affection, and Appreciation.  So far, we’ve covered the tools for Attention, so you haven’t missed much.  But it’s best to start from the beginning because each blogs builds upon the last....

September 15, 2017

In my last blog we discussed the idea of how to make your wife happy.  Insert obvious joke here.  We introduced the topic of Attention, including Undivided Attention (no tv, no cell phones, no electronic devices of any kind), and Assuming the position (sitting close to your wife, arms and legs uncrossed, while maintaining eye contact).  Explanations and the importance of these can be found in my previous blog.   Homework was give to practice 2 minutes of Undivided Attention every day for the past 7 days.  So, how did it go?  Wa...

September 1, 2017

In my last blog we discussed the findings from my interviews and counseling with many couples.  To bring you up to speed, here’s what we found.  Men and women are, DIFFERENT!!!  Not even within the same solar system, different.  Women defined themselves as ‘Relationship Beings’, meaning that the essence of who they are is built around their relationships.  Men, on the other hand, are not (Relationship Beings).  The problem here is that you now have a ‘Relationship Being’ in the most important relationship of her life with someo...

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